Broken And Sore

I know how it feels to be a prisoner controlled, beaten and chained by the things of this world. The pain, the dark dreary cloud lurking about; and the struggles of getting free from the depression, drugs and other addictions in my life.

I know how it feels to feel desperate as despair, confusion, strife, envy, jealousy, hate, lies and every evil force fights for my mind; leaving me broken and sore.

I know how it feels to live without love as a child. The abuse that never seems to end. I know how it feels to be without a friend or to have anyone I could trust enough to talk to.

I know how it feels to have just emptiness of nothing every going right in my life, and having a void in my heart that no man could ever feel.

I know how it feels to see others laughing having a good time; as I faked a laugh yet feeling as if I wanted to curl up and die.

I know how it feels to play second fiddle to those I have loved from the start.

I know how it feels to see them care for other's as I stand so near, like I have no feelings or even a single care.

I know how it feels to have others walk over my heart and never look back to see if I survived another blow; not caring that they had broken another piece of my heart.

I know how it feels to be in a group of people whom seems to have the world by its tail, as I had no hope for anything but doom.

I know how it feels to be betrayed over and over again, in the name of love. Even by the friend who claimed to stand by my side until the very end.

I know how it feels to have a tongue filled with more venom then any snake. Striking out causing great pain, not caring who it hurt, maimed or killed as I tried to ease my pain.

The snake bit me many times and in the end, I lost control over my mind, leaving thoughts to run wild and controlled by the god of this world. All the while, feeling unworthy to call out to the God; the one I knew could save me in the end.

I know how it feels to have people lie to your face, stab you in the back as they smile in your face, making you believe one more lie.

I know how it feels to hear, "I'm Sorry," one more time, as the attacker thinks these two little words cover the mean deed, yet things never change.

I know how it feels to spend hour's on end wondering what I have done to deserve this life of torment and pain.

I know how it feel's to wonder if I will ever make a difference to anyone in this crazy world.

I know how it feels to yearn for someone to love and care about just me.

Oh yea, I know what it feels like to be broken and sore.

I know how it feels to be without a job, money or the things others just take for granted. I know how it feels to be so inadequate I can't even think for myself.

I know how it feels to have the spirit within me crushed and near death.

I know how it feels, when a gentle whisper speaking softly in my ears says, "You Matter Dear!" words that bring a glitter of hope.

I know how it feels when the hand of the Living God reaches down from heaven and wipes my tears.

I know how it feels to hear him say, "I forgive you of you sins, and I will love you know matter what else anyone else thinks, for you matter too me dear."

Yes friend, I know exactly how it feels to lay broken and sore, with no hopes of ever being able to fly again.

As I prepared to end my life to stop the torment and pain, I cried out,"Doesn't anybody care?" and I heard, "I do."

I know how it feels to lay in the arms of Jesus as He soothed and cared for my broken heart.. As I could only cry. I felt Jesus gently wipe each tear and listened as He reassured me there was a better life.

Jesus stood at the door of my heart knocking, but I would never let him in; until my life was at its end.

Afterwards, I realized there wasn't a problem too big for Jesus to handle and now he carries my heavy load...allowing me to become a person who can smile one more time.

Dear Friend, I do care about your brokeness and so does Jesus! There is nothing He doesn't understand. There is nothing He won't forgive. But it takes you to open that door and invite Him in.

Romans 10:13

Whosoever shall call upon the Lord, Shall be saved.

So friend if you are as broken as I have been, here's your chance.